At some point I stopped stand-up because I didn’t have something to say on a nightly basis.
BILLY CRYSTALI think when I feel I’m at my best is when I’m on stage, and it’s my version of jazz because it’s just riffing or something.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.
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Well, the way things are going, aside from wheat and auto parts, America’s biggest export is now the Oscar.
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Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I’d always go off book and start improvising.
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There’s a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there’s usually only one thing you can do. Go through his clothes and look for loose change.
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You have to always remember they’re not your own kids. Play with them, love them, spoil them to death – then hand them back.
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A laugh is a weird sound, and when you get a couple thousand people making it at once, it’s really strange. But when I can feel proud of myself for causing it, it’s great.
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It is better to look good than to feel good.
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When comedy is good, it’s jazz. The beats of it, the looseness, the improvisational part, the music-the way you hit the inflection, the high notes of a joke. It’s all melody to me.
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Change is such hard work.
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Dad had a music store, and he’d often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.
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Kids need a happy household. They need to be loved and supported in their dreams. And I don’t think you can make your kids’ dreams your own. They need you to support them in their dreams.
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Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
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I’m comfortable being old… being black… being Jewish.
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In high school, I was the class comedian as opposed to the class clown. The difference is the class clown is the guy who drops his pants at the football game, the class comedian is the guy who talked him into it.
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When you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.
BILLY CRYSTAL