A fart is just your arse applauding.
BILLY CONNOLLYA fart is just your arse applauding.
BILLY CONNOLLYI am totally, absolutely romantic. When I broke up with a girl I would listen to the most heart-breaking music and make it worse. That’s what girls do. I think I am a girl really.
BILLY CONNOLLYDon’t work out, work in.
BILLY CONNOLLYI decided to stop drinking while it was still my idea.
BILLY CONNOLLYWithout arts programmes there’s only reality TV, and reality TV needs the arts to show it what reality is.
BILLY CONNOLLYI don’t know why I should have to learn Algebra… I’m never likely to go there.
BILLY CONNOLLYI still do my comedy and my performance stuff and my acting so it’s not all-consuming. But I do find myself drawing more and more these days.
BILLY CONNOLLYI once travelled to Adelaide on Emu Airways. I was 5,000 ft up in the air when someone pointed out to me that emus can’t fly
BILLY CONNOLLYI used to have Mad Cow’s disease, but I’m alright Nooooooooow.
BILLY CONNOLLYTread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.
BILLY CONNOLLYTry to live in a place you like.
BILLY CONNOLLYI’m not going to throw away the hand of friendship to suit 100 Trotskyites in Glasgow.
BILLY CONNOLLYI’d always been scared of people with tertiary education and high intellects in case they found me wanting. I thought they viewed me as just a welder who knew a few jokes.
BILLY CONNOLLYI don’t believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don’t want to say I don’t believe in God, but I don’t think I do. But I believe in people who do.
BILLY CONNOLLYIt seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he’s telling them all different things.
BILLY CONNOLLYA mate of mine has just told me he’s shagging his girlfriend and her twin, I said how can you tell them apart, he said “her brothers got a moustache!”
BILLY CONNOLLY