“Sometimes there’s a tackiness about Route 66 that out-tacks any tackiness I’ve ever seen anywhere else. And the Meramec Caverns are the pinnacle of that tack.”

I’m a huge film star… but you have to hurry to the movies, because I usually die in the first 15 f–ing minutes. I’m the only guy I know who died in a f–ing Muppet movie.

Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet.

If I had a hammer, there’d be no more folksingers.

If the Space Beings want to contact you, they will do so. They do the choosing.

The great thing about Glasgow is that if there’s a nuclear attack it’ll look exactly the same afterwards.

Don’t Make Assumptions. Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Joy was more than just an absence of discomfort.

Acting is a different discipline. On stage I’m free to say what I please. But the change is very good for ya.

There’s nothing better than a fight, especially when you’re watching it from a safe place. You can yell encouragement! Hit him with the left, he’s a big Jessie!

If you have to remind yourself to concentrate during competition, you’ve got no chance to concentrate.

He even jeopardized his pledge to preserve women’s rights under Roe v. Wade in order to get a health care bill written by the corporate lapdog Max Baucus and the gang of revolving door mercenaries he hired to write a bill friendly to industry.

On pragmatistic principles, if the hypothesis of God works satisfactorily in the widest sense of the word, it is true.

A testimony is a testimony, and it should be respected, whether it is small or large.

Don’t work out, work in.

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?

I can’t believe in Christianity, but I think Jesus was a wonderful teacher.

Nice to be here? At my age it’s nice to be anywhere.

I’ll try any guitar just to see if it’s different in an effort to see if it will lead me anywhere.

All I know is, if you listen to society, you’ll never get anywhere!

I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move.

If you start from nothing, it is very difficult to get anywhere.

For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move.

You will not find poetry anywhere unless you bring some of it with you.

My dad is the best and funniest newspaper columnist. There is nobody anywhere near as good.