Hobbes: Do you think there’s a God? Calvin: Well, somebody’s out to get me!
BILL WATTERSONEverybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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I try to make everyone’s day a little more surreal.
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Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
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Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
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I know the world isn’t fair, but why isn’t it ever unfair in my favor?
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I liked things better when I didn’t understand them.
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With each decision, we tell ourselves and the world who we are. Think about what you want out of this life, and recognize that there are many kinds of success.
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[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble] Calvin: Ha! I’ve got a great word and it’s on a “Double word score” box! Hobbes: “ZQFMGB” isn’t a word! It doesn’t even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It’s a worm found in New Guinea!
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Now if a joke is in bad taste or it’s not funny, okay, that’s awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer’s job is, and I don’t think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.
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Of course, REAL zombies never get the giggles when they look at each other.
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Hobbes: Jump! Jump! Jump! I win! Calvin: You win? Aaugghh! You won last time! I hate it when you win! Aarrggh! Mff! Gnnk! I hate this game! I hate the whole world! Aghhh!
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You can drag my body to school but my spirit refuses to go.
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Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.
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I would turn out rough idea after rough idea, and he would veto eighty percent of them. I pretty much prostituted myself for six months but I couldn’t please him, so he sent me packing.
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I’ve got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.
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Calvin: Today for show and tell, I’ve brought a tiny miracle of nature: a single snowflake!
BILL WATTERSON