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I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?

Bill Watterson

You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.
BILL WATTERSON

Congratulation Cynically Expect Manipulate Nothing Taught
What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!
BILL WATTERSON

Cheat Game Idiotic Lose Play Sneaky Some Undermanned
You can drag my body to school but my spirit refuses to go.
BILL WATTERSON

Body School Spirit
I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.
BILL WATTERSON

Comic Existentialism Laughing Strips
It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.
BILL WATTERSON

Lobotomy Needs Saws
A day can really slip by when you’re deliberately avoiding what you’re supposed to do.
BILL WATTERSON

Avoiding Hobbies Slips
The problem with the future is that it keeps turning into the present.
BILL WATTERSON

Funny Future Humorous
I let my mind wander and it didn’t come back.
BILL WATTERSON

Bumper Funny Mind Sticker Wander
In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.
BILL WATTERSON

Long Memories Outside School Successful Term
I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.
BILL WATTERSON

Behavior Encouragement Friendship Modification
Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery – it recharges by running.
BILL WATTERSON

Car Mind Running
I’M SIGNIFICANT!!! … Say’s the dust speck.
BILL WATTERSON

Dust Say Significant Specks
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
BILL WATTERSON

Funny Inspirational Sarcastic
It’s hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.
BILL WATTERSON

Incinerated People Religious
I’ve got to start listening to those quiet, nagging doubts.
BILL WATTERSON

Doubt Listening Nagging
Suddenly, we realize our time in here is fleeting. Is our quick experience here pointless?
BILL WATTERSON

Experience Pointless Suddenly Time

I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?

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I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Watterson Quotes