Dinosaur fossils were placed in rocks by prankster God just to make human beings think the world is older than it is.
BILL HICKSPornography is any act that has no artistic merit and causes sexual thoughts…Sounds like almost every commercial on TV to me.
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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Why do we put people who are on drugs in jail? They’re sick, they’re not criminals. Sick people don’t get healed in prison. You see? It makes no sense.
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You know what I hate about working? Bosses…The very idea that ANYONE could be my boss, well…I think you see the conflict.
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Do I have a message? Yes, I do. Here’s my message: as scary as the world is – and it is – it is merely a ride …
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Don’t worry; don’t be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride.
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I’ve had good times on drugs…bad times on drugs…But I’ve had good and bad relationships…and I’m not giving up pussy.
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Music is a great energizer. It’s a language everybody knows.
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How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again? …Seventy percent. What the fuck? Where did they take this poll, at an S&M parlor?
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What do you say we lighten things up and talk about abortion?
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When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.
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You know, when I see those two twins on that Doublemint commercial? I’m not thinking of gum. I am thinking of chewing, so maybe that’s the connection they’re trying to make.
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No one can give you any answers. There aren’t any. You have to discover for yourself-you must learn to navigate the mystery.
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We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
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I am a misanthropic humanist… Do I like people? They’re great, IN THEORY.
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So, it’s good to be here, wherever I am.
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To me pornography is…spending all your money and not educating the people in America, but spending it instead on weapons.
BILL HICKS