They believe the bible is the exact word of God – Then they change the bible! Pretty presumptuous, hu huh? “I think what God meant to say…”
BILL HICKS[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is…thinking, ‘This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.’
More Bill Hicks Quotes
-
-
You know, when I see those two twins on that Doublemint commercial? I’m not thinking of gum. I am thinking of chewing, so maybe that’s the connection they’re trying to make.
BILL HICKS -
I, like all artists in Western cultures, am a shaman…come in the guise of a comic…to heal perception by using…’jokes’.
BILL HICKS -
Mister, I don’t want no trouble. I just came downtown here to get some hard rock candy for my kids, some gingham for my wife. I don’t even know what gingham is, but she goes through about ten rolls a week of that stuff. I ain’t looking for no trouble, Mister.
BILL HICKS -
I believe that the Bible is the literal word of God. And I say no, it’s not, Dad. Well, I believe that it is. Well, you know, some people believe they’re Napoleon. That’s fine. Beliefs are neat. Cherish them, but don’t share them like they’re the truth.
BILL HICKS -
Women priests. Great, great. Now there’s priests of both sexes I don’t listen to.
BILL HICKS -
Would you let the aliens land, please? They might be here to pick me up.
BILL HICKS -
I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative.
BILL HICKS -
When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.
BILL HICKS -
Rock stars hawking Diet Cokes–are demons set loose on the Earth to lower the standards for the perfect & holy children of God!
BILL HICKS -
It’s always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s just hilarious.
BILL HICKS -
I guess what surprised me the most was the discrepancy in casualties: Iraq, one hundred fifty thousand casualties, USA: seventy-nine!
BILL HICKS -
I’m a heavy smoker. I go through two lighters a day.
BILL HICKS -
Are gun rights advocates arguing that roving gangs…shooting innocent bystanders constitutes a ‘well-regulated militia’?
BILL HICKS -
We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
BILL HICKS -
The world’s like a ride in a fairground & when you choose to go on it you think it’s real, that’s how powerful our minds are
BILL HICKS