You’re mugging old ladies every bit as much if you pinch their pension fund
BEN ELTONAnd of course to hunt down sedition. Only paper is safe. Books are the key. A book cannot be accessed from afar, you have to hold it, you have to read it.
More Ben Elton Quotes
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I don’t know what people who I’ve never met think about me. Some have written horrible things, some have written nice things – but I’m proud of the fact I’ve remained close to everyone I’ve ever worked with.
BEN ELTON -
I did not vote Labour because they’ve heard of Oasis and nobody is going to vote Tory because William Hague has got a baseball cap.
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I exercise hard and the reason I do is so that I can earn the things I like to consume.
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The earth only has so much bounty to offer and inventing ever larger and more notional prices for that bounty does not change its real value.
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The worst thing about being a great power is when you’re not one any more. It takes centuries to get over it.
BEN ELTON -
Beyond love, beyond unrequited love, perhaps even beyond any other passion known to humanity, deep, deep in the depths of the turgid, clinging, swamplike pit of despair that lies dormant within every soul, lurks JEALOUSY.
BEN ELTON -
Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I’d never used it. I’m 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s.
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Leaders should never, ever try to look cool – that’s for dictators
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And roast beef and Yorkshire pudding is my personal signature dish.
BEN ELTON -
If I did things for the money, I’d have done adverts in the 1980s, when I was hot enough to be offered them, and ‘Police Academy 6,’ which I was asked to write.
BEN ELTON -
Kingsley watched her disappear from the room, wondering if his heart would break. Logic informed him that of course it would not. The heart was no more than a muscle, a pump which distributed blood about the body.
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I’m lucky because the strongest emotion I have ever felt is being in love, and that definitely informs my writing.
BEN ELTON -
You didn’t wake up, your dreams just changed gear.
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If only the strength of the love that people feel when it is reciprocated could be as intense and obsessive as the love we feel when it is not; then marriages would be truly made in heaven.
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I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it’s a risk worth running.
BEN ELTON