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“Trust me, you don’t want to have to actually interact with these people.”

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I actually wanted to be an attorney. I did do things on the side like improv and sketch comedy, but law was my focus. I was a very bookish, academic kid. When I got out of college,
AISHA TYLER

Academic Actually Attorney Bookish College Comedy Focus Improv Kid Law Sketch Thing Want
They always say some women like to fix people. I don’t like to fix people, but you like a challenge.
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Always Challenge Fix People Some Women
You can only really learn from failure … To win, you need to fail, and fail hard.
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Fail Failure Fun Hard Learn Need Winning
I’m just myself, so I don’t know that I think of myself as a nerd icon.
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Icon Know Myself Nerd Thinking
I talk to grown-ups who are out to have a good time and they want to be spoken to in a different way.
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Different Good Grown Spoken Time Trying Up Want Way
I don’t believe in superheroes but I love Batman movies. There’s a part of every person that is entertained by the idealistic, the fantastic.
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Batman Believe Entertain Fantastic Idealistic Movie Person Superhero
I always tell people that if you really want to know somebody, they should listen to that person’s interview with me. I spend a lot of time with my guests.
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Always Guest Interview Know Listen People Person Really Somebody Tell Want
If you ever needed to ruin someone’s fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.
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Move Need Poop Ruin Someone Terminate Thing Workplace
Karaoke is the great equalizer.
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Equalizer Inspirational Karaoke
No one wants to hear about how awesome you were; people want to hear about the time you blew it.
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Awesome Blew Hear Need People Thinking Time Want
I spent most of my seventh grade summer dehydrated, green-tongued, and smelling like a Malaysian whorehouse.
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Country Dehydrate Grade Green Most Seventh Smelling Spent Summer
I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living.
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College Comedian Growing Kid Loving People Up Wanted
I love being married. I love my husband. I think married people always have that thing where they think that the grass is greener on the single side, but all my single friends are like,
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Fail Hate Husband Love Think Want
Am I going to complain about being typecast as smart? I don’t think so.
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Complain Going Smart Think Typecast
the freedom to live a life free of fear of violence, to select a fulfilling career and be compensated fairly, to choose when to start a family, to marry whom you love.
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Brand Carrer Compensate Everyone Family Free Freedom Life Live Marry Personal Start
I take the most wrenchingly painful moments of my life, brush them off and present them for the amusement of others. Luckily for me, my childhood was torture.
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Amusement Brush Childhood Life Luckily Moment Other Painful Torture Wrenching

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