black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.

Aisha Tyler

I don’t believe in superheroes but I love Batman movies. There’s a part of every person that is entertained by the idealistic, the fantastic.
AISHA TYLER

Batman Believe Entertain Fantastic Idealistic Movie Person Superhero
I think I was only attracted to drunken douches before I got married.
AISHA TYLER

Attract Before Douch Drunken Married Thinking
One thing we do really well on Archer and one thing I’ve always tried to do in my comedy and my writing and my podcast is to never speak down to my audience.
AISHA TYLER

Always Archer Audience Comedy Podcast Really Tried Writing
Much like a wobbly toddler or an unhinged politician, one immediately looks for someone else to blame. God. Your parents. Ex-girlfriends. Undocumented immigrants. Marvin in Human Resources. China.
AISHA TYLER

Blame Else God Human Immediate Look Much Parent Politician Resource Someone Toddler
If you ever needed to ruin someone’s fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.
AISHA TYLER

Move Need Poop Ruin Someone Terminate Thing Workplace
I think diversity in television is important. It’s not about trying to fill a quota or satisfy some idea of diversity.
AISHA TYLER

Diversity Fill Idea Important Opportunity Quita Satisfy Some Television Thinking Trying
I want everyone, regardless of gender, to live a life free of restriction or fear, able to pursue their own personal brand of happiness and fulfillment.
AISHA TYLER

Battle Brand Easy Fought Fulfillment Goal Matter One Personal Really Sacrifice Worth
When I was young I thought, ‘Yeah, people don’t see, they’re not recognizing how funny I am, and how talented I am’. And the guys that mentored me were like, ‘
AISHA TYLER

Funny Guy Look People Recognize Talented Thought
So much of a stand-up’s life is doing live radio and having to be funny and quick on the spot with these strangers, and sort of surgical in terms of how funny I can be in three minutes.
AISHA TYLER

Doing Funny Life Live Minute Much Quick Radio Sou Spot Stand Stranger Surgical Three
After going through a lot of procedures and spending a lot of money … the doctor said, ‘Look, based on what we’re seeing here, I just don’t think this is going to happen for you.’
AISHA TYLER

Based Doctors Going Happen Look Procedure Spending Thinking
I am absolutely a Giants fan and I’m a Dynasty baby so I was a 49ers fan for a long time.
AISHA TYLER

Absolutely Baby Dynasty Fan Giant Long Time
My parents were vegetarians. I’d show up at school, this giant black kid, with none of the cool clothes and a tofu sandwich and celery sticks.
AISHA TYLER

Cloth Kids Parent School Stick Vegetarian
No one wants to hear about how awesome you were; people want to hear about the time you blew it.
AISHA TYLER

Awesome Blew Hear Need People Thinking Time Want
I love to be busy and be challenged. I’m my happiest when I’m under pressure and almost overwhelmed by how much I have to get done.
AISHA TYLER

Challenge Done Happiest Much Overwhelmed Pressure Under
“Trust me, you don’t want to have to actually interact with these people.”
AISHA TYLER

Actual Interact Me People Trust
I can tell you this: Stand-up is not glamorous.
AISHA TYLER

Glamorous Stand Tell Up

Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Aisha Tyler Quotes