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You just have to keep getting up’. And I look back and they were right. They were all right.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Much like a wobbly toddler or an unhinged politician, one immediately looks for someone else to blame. God. Your parents. Ex-girlfriends. Undocumented immigrants. Marvin in Human Resources. China.
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I’m such a geek, and have always been a real nerd.
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I can tell you this: Stand-up is not glamorous.
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I love being married. I love my husband. I think married people always have that thing where they think that the grass is greener on the single side, but all my single friends are like,
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So I think the longer you do stand-up, the more comfortable you are. You stop wanting to hide your foibles and instead want to show who you are.
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Karaoke is the great equalizer.
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TV always wants more people to be watching.
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Pop culture is great, but it can be bad, at times.
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Maybe the nails are a little stubby and gnawed on, but I definitely do not have man hands.
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I actually wanted to be an attorney. I did do things on the side like improv and sketch comedy, but law was my focus. I was a very bookish, academic kid. When I got out of college,
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When I get old and slow down I want to look behind me and see all the fire and the wreckage and no stone left unturned.
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If you haven’t noticed yet, working sucks. Unless you are a racecar driver or an astronaut or Beyonce, working is completely and utterly devoid of awesome.
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Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.
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“You are going to fail, and anyone who is success has powered through many, many failures.”
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I am absolutely a Giants fan and I’m a Dynasty baby so I was a 49ers fan for a long time.
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I love to be busy and be challenged. I’m my happiest when I’m under pressure and almost overwhelmed by how much I have to get done.
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