I’m a sucker for a free tuxedo.
BILLY CRYSTALI was introducing [director and producer] Hal Roach – Mr. Roach was 100 years old, he was one of the fathers of early days in films, he put Laurel with Hardy, he created the Our Gang kids, and all these silent movies he did – he was a giant.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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It is better to look good than to feel good.
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I had really good hearing and when you’re scared it gets heightened so you hear scratching noises or something.
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You really have to have some muscle to be on the stage in front of the world.
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I’d like to think there is a Heaven, and it starts from the happiest day in your life.
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I’m going to go on just living and laughing and loving.
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I was introducing [director and producer] Hal Roach – Mr. Roach was 100 years old, he was one of the fathers of early days in films, he put Laurel with Hardy, he created the Our Gang kids, and all these silent movies he did – he was a giant.
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At some point I stopped stand-up because I didn’t have something to say on a nightly basis.
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I always came away thinking “I’d like to see her more,” you know? And then when [Parental Guidance] was ready to be cast, we thought – Bette [Midler]. So we called her.
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Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
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I think when I feel I’m at my best is when I’m on stage, and it’s my version of jazz because it’s just riffing or something.
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I’m a baby. I sleep like a baby – I’m up every two hours. And I think a lot. I worry a lot. I have great nights of no sleep where ideas come.
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You give up your dream, you give up.
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In high school, I was the class comedian as opposed to the class clown. The difference is the class clown is the guy who drops his pants at the football game, the class comedian is the guy who talked him into it.
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It’s money. I remember it from when I was single
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I don’t like heights. This is why I stopped growing at fifth grade.
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