It’s my mind, and I reserve the right to change it as often as I like.
BILLY CONNOLLYI decided to stop drinking while it was still my idea.
More Billy Connolly Quotes
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Paddy was in the delivery room when the midwife handed him a black baby. “Is this yours?” she asked “probably” said Paddy “she burns everything else”
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I’d never consciously left home to see a zombie movie. They were fine by me, but I had no intention of ever being in one. But I’ve been learning more about it as I’ve been doing interviews. I
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Never run with scissors or other pointy objects.
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I was brought up a Catholic, for that you get an A level in guilt.
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Don’t vote, it only encourages them.
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A lot of people are too easily offended. Religious people, for instance. They’ve been offending other people for centuries.
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I became a welder. I was actually becoming an Engineer and I joined the wrong queue. And so I became a welder, without knowing what a welder was.
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I decided to stop drinking while it was still my idea.
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My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.
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I set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce.
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I am totally, absolutely romantic. When I broke up with a girl I would listen to the most heart-breaking music and make it worse. That’s what girls do. I think I am a girl really.
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I think age is terribly overrated. You’re okay as long as you don’t grow up. By all means grow old, but don’t mature. Remain childlike, retain wonder, the ability to be flabbergasted by something.
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Once you become successful, people know where you live, the type of house you live in, the kind of car you drive, the clothes you wear, and so it would be patronising to go and talk like a welder. Welding’s a mystery to me now. You can’t go back, your life changes every day.
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I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a rotten word because it makes you think you are useless.
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A mate of mine has just told me he’s shagging his girlfriend and her twin, I said how can you tell them apart, he said “her brothers got a moustache!”
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