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History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That’s why events are always reinterpreted when values change.

Bill Watterson

I’m learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework…procrastinating and negotiation.
BILL WATTERSON

Homework Negotiation Procrastinating Skills Use
In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.
BILL WATTERSON

Long Memories Outside School Successful Term
And it will be even more exciting if anyone pays for them. It’s hard to charge admission without a gate.
BILL WATTERSON

Admission Anyone Exciting Gate More
You know, maybe we don’t need enemies.” “Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.
BILL WATTERSON

Enemy Maybe Needs Take Yeah
Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery – it recharges by running.
BILL WATTERSON

Car Mind Running
Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
BILL WATTERSON

Demand Ecstasy Enough
It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.
BILL WATTERSON

Lobotomy Needs Saws
That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.
BILL WATTERSON

Problem Science Trying Unimaginable
It’s surprising how hard we’ll work when the work is done just for ourselves.
BILL WATTERSON

Done Hard Surprising
I would turn out rough idea after rough idea, and he would veto eighty percent of them. I pretty much prostituted myself for six months but I couldn’t please him, so he sent me packing.
BILL WATTERSON

Idea Packing Percent Prostituted
Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.
BILL WATTERSON

Life Needs Surprise
Leader, bandits at 2 o’clock! Roger; it’s only 1:30 now-what’ll I do ’til then?
BILL WATTERSON

Clock Funny Leader Roger
Like delicate lace, so the threads intertwine, oh, gossamer web of wond’rous design! Such beauty and grace wild nature produces… Ughh, look at that spider suck out that bug’s juices!
BILL WATTERSON

Design Grace Produce Spiders
I’ve always tried to make the strip animated, even when the characters aren’t moving, with expressions or perspectives or some sort of exaggeration.
BILL WATTERSON

Aggerations Character Expression Moving
Hobbes: Do you think there’s a God? Calvin: Well, somebody’s out to get me!
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbes Thinking Wells
Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world’s problems?
BILL WATTERSON

Inspirational Life Peace

History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That’s why events are always reinterpreted when values change.

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History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That’s why events are always reinterpreted when values change.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bill Watterson Quotes