Artists don’t create society, they reflect it
BEN ELTONLeaders should never, ever try to look cool – that’s for dictators
More Ben Elton Quotes
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I’m easy to work with, not a pushover, but I respond to criticism and find it inspiring.
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Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I’d never used it. I’m 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s.
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No collection of people who are all waiting for the same thing are capable of holding a natural conversation. Even if the thing they are waiting for is only a taxi.
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Kingsley watched her disappear from the room, wondering if his heart would break. Logic informed him that of course it would not. The heart was no more than a muscle, a pump which distributed blood about the body.
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I don’t consider myself Jewish. I am half-Jewish by race but not through my mother.
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There are lots of things I could have done for the money, but I’ve made a great living doing the things I want to do.
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Comedy will always be central to what I do, it’s just an instinct for me, but I am a writer and always have been.
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The Germans are a cruel race. Their operas last for six hours and they have no word for fluffy.
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And of course to hunt down sedition. Only paper is safe. Books are the key. A book cannot be accessed from afar, you have to hold it, you have to read it.
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My parents were secular. I am an atheist.
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You didn’t wake up, your dreams just changed gear.
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You’re mugging old ladies every bit as much if you pinch their pension fund
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I’m lucky because the strongest emotion I have ever felt is being in love, and that definitely informs my writing.
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For the past seventeen years I have been experimenting with lager. I am a lager user and one drug leads to another. If you do lager, as night follows day, you’ll end up doing Kentucky Fried Chicken.
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I did not vote Labour because they’ve heard of Oasis and nobody is going to vote Tory because William Hague has got a baseball cap.
BEN ELTON