I’ve got a role in the new Billy Bob Thornton movie that Billy Bob wrote and is going to direct called ‘Jayne Mansfield’s Car.’ I only have four scenes, but I have as much dialogue as anybody in the movie.
RON WHITEThe only thing I really worry about is my live stand-up show because I have to answer to the fans.
More Ron White Quotes
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I was so in love with the idea of making people laugh for a living that I didn’t care what I had to do to get there. Or how much money I was going to make when I did get there.
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When I was 20, I used to go around telling stories, and I knew where I was comfortable – onstage, talking, making ’em laugh and listen to the weirdest things. I liked being the center of attention.
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I think the world has their own good, clean, Christian comedy. They don’t need my help.
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Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.
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I was by far the least popular of the Blue Collar crew when we started. There was a definite pecking order, and everybody knew it.
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I don’t watch Comedy Central. I don’t enjoy it.
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All of my comedian friends are some of the best joke writers in the world.
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I don’t like to do material people have heard. Now, they like to hear material that they know, because that’s the stuff that made me famous, and, unfortunately, I don’t do a ton of it.
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Think of The Rontourage as the Ron White Channel, where you can see us getting into trouble in all kinds of different places.
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TV is a hard job. You work 15 hours a day. People tell you what to do. I hate to do it.
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You can tell on-stage when a joke’s starting to lose its pop. It doesn’t mean people don’t want to hear it anymore; it means I don’t want to do it anymore. Because I want to move on to something that has a knee-jerk reaction just like you get when you tell somebody a joke that they’ve never heard.
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That’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.
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I write all of my material. It’s all me.
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You can teach somebody how to be a brain surgeon, but you cannot teach them how to walk on a stage and make people laugh.
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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
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I had the right to remain silent… but I didn’t have the ability.
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My show is more storytelling now than it’s ever been. It’s what I’m good at.
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I guarantee there’s people who watch television who have no idea how complicated it is to make a television show.
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You know, my first album, some of those jokes I’d done for twelve years because I couldn’t throw ’em out.
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I begged the universe to make me a famous comedian, and it did. So I tend not to ask for any more.
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I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.
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There have been times in my life that I’ve had a ton of vices, and my demons have run amok for years and years and years.
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If I sit down to write a joke about, whatever, the polluted Gulf of Mexico, it comes out mundane to me.
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I’ve been married a few times. I’m not good at it.
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Pace, rhythm and timing. Pace, rhythm and timing is what it’s about. The content’s got to be great, but then it’s got to be delivered. It’s a tricky thing to do, and it takes a lot of work.
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