You can’t fix stupid.
RON WHITEI go through about 140 cities a year.
More Ron White Quotes
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When I was about 12 years old back in Houston, my Dad used to take us to the driving range.
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I think honest communication, no matter where it comes from, is positive for a relationship.
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I don’t do talk shows or go on Dr. Phil’s show. He’s a friend of mine, and, no, he doesn’t give me any advice. He doesn’t give solicited advice.
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I believe that a bad Super Bowl halftime show is still better than a soccer game.
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I write all of my material. It’s all me.
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If you look at the common denominator of all the comics who have had big success, it’s being true to their nature… that’s what takes a long time to learn.
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If I see someone out there mouthing the words to a bit, I’m not having fun.
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I had the right to remain silent… but I didn’t have the ability.
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Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine’s putting in an express lane.
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I could do no wrong in my mother’s eyes from the day I was born. My fans bought her a very nice house in San Antonio, and she has a great life.
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Donald Trump – and I don’t dislike Donald one single bit – has no idea how good the Mexican people are at building tunnels.
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I think the world has their own good, clean, Christian comedy. They don’t need my help.
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My uncle was a preacher, and I used to go watch him preach. He was also funny, so I’m very ‘preacher-ish’ on stage, not by intent but because that’s where I learned to talk in front of people.
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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
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TV is a hard job. You work 15 hours a day. People tell you what to do. I hate to do it.
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