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I think there are all kinds of different hells. It’s not a place you go to after you die.

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The Freedom of Information Act doesn’t apply to Silicon Valley. And you can’t impeach Google if it breaks its ‘Don’t be evil’ campaign pledge.
AL FRANKEN

Campaign Freedom Google Impeach Information Pledge Silicon Valley
Gary Bauer is a very good – he’s a good friend of mine.
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Friend Good Mine People Very
I ask the American people not to fall victim to disinformation. There are no death panels. The Affordable Care Act cuts the deficit.
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Country Cut Death Disinformation Fall No Panel People Victim
At ‘SNL,’ I wrote political stuff, but I never felt the show should have an axe to grind. But when I left in ’95, I could let my own beliefs out.
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If 98 out of 100 doctors tell me I’ve got a problem, I should take their advice.
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Advice Doctor Problem Snack Take Teall Two
I anticipate that Apple’s fingerprint reader will in fact make iPhone 5S owners more likely to secure their smartphones.
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Anticipate Apple Fact Fingerprint iPhone Likely Make More Reader Secure Smartphone
I do have a self-censor; everybody does, or at least most who are not pathological do.
AL FRANKEN

Censor Do Doe Everybody Least Most Pathology Self
I wish I had spent more time at the office and less time in prison.
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Less More Office Prison Spent Time Wish
You have to love your country like an adult loves somebody, not like a child loves its Mommy. And right-wing Republicans tend to love America like a child loves its Mommy, where everything Mommy does is okay.
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Adult Child Children Country Like Love Mean Mommy Somebody
It was hard for him to project who he is, the person people know in private.
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Hard Him Know People Person Private Project
And terror is indiscriminate murder of civilians to make a political point.
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Indiscriminate Make Murder Point Political Terror
My dad didn’t graduate from high school, ended up being a printing salesman, probably never made more than $8,000 a year.
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Dad End Graduate Mom Print Real Salesman School
Humor and seriousness are not in opposition to each other.
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Each Other Humor Opposition Seriousness
People lucky enough to live in the vicinity of an industrial hog farm are, with each breath, made keenly aware of the cause of their declining property values.
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If you hear, day after day, liberals are rooting against armed forces.
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I’ve spent my entire career being a satirist.
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Career Entire Satirist Spent

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