More from Al Franken
As a source of innovation, an engine of our economy, and a forum for our political discourse.
Al FrankenAl Franken I don’t know how many of you have been to New York, but if a building is two blocks away from anything, you can’t see it.
Al FrankenAl Franken If you control the flow of information, you can control the conversation around important issues. If you can control the conversation, you can change this country.
Al FrankenAl Franken creates jobs all over the world, and makes life easier for millions of Americans.
Al FrankenAl Franken And when you hit him, he runs to the teacher and says, ‘Teacher, sue him.’
Al FrankenAl Franken Minnesotans lost their jobs because the credit rating agencies didn’t do the only job they’re supposed to have.
Al FrankenAl Franken And the agencies concluded that the Russians had a clear preference for President Trump.
Al FrankenAl Franken Part of the middle class promise is that, after a lifetime of hard work, you’ll be able to retire and enjoy the fruits of that labor.
Al FrankenAl Franken I’m a perfectionist and if I start making changes, I’ll never stop.
Al FrankenAl Franken Whining is anger through a small opening.
Al FrankenAl Franken The guy who ran it at first misled pretty much everybody about how much capital we had.
Al FrankenAl Franken Having an actual income can expand your romantic horizons toward the more appealing end of the spectrum.
Al FrankenAl Franken Bill Clinton is the greatest president of the 20th century because I played touch football with him.
Al FrankenAl Franken My dad was a terrible businessman.
Al FrankenAl Franken If you look at terrorists, they really have no sense of humor.
Al FrankenAl Franken Well, I think that there’s a value to comedy in and of itself.
Al FrankenAl Franken
Original quotes
From our community writers
Someone rejected you does not mean you are not worthy. Maybe they can’t afford to be with you.
Jacklyn TysonJacklyn Tyson I will love you from afar it’s better this way because close up it hurts too much.
Melissa AndersonMelissa Anderson Maybe if you hold me tight, our love won’t be as shallow.
Mira R. AridiMira R. Aridi Sometimes a person is in peace & in the piece at the same time.
Jessica CollinsJessica Collins Between day and night there was a moment of silence.
Frode GaslandFrode Gasland But doesn’t it hurt to feel so much and pretend not to?
Brad NeatonBrad Neaton Admire your sweet way of glowing; your passionate way of flowing.
Ana SoulfulAna Soulful Darling, you are a warrior, for even though each day feels like a battle, you keep fighting and live on.
Sarah ShawkatSarah Shawkat
Meet the writers
More on arm
There’s a lot of different ways that a song would be a challenge to parody.
Al YankovicAl Yankovic That he armed the Mujahideen, that he armed Saddam, that he armed Iran, that he armed two-thirds of the Axis of Evil, and that he funded terrorists in Central America. He was, in my mind, a terrible president.
Al FrankenAl Franken ” Let me take two shots in the arm and a punch on the nose and let me get on to the next thing.
Al McGuireAl McGuire Another reason is baseball has to compete with other sports now – basketball, football, soccer – for the better athletes that might have more skills and stronger arms.
Al KalineAl Kaline I think if you’re going to do a movie about Reagan, you do it about the fact that he created the huge deficit.
Al FrankenAl Franken Armed with nothing more than a Facebook user’s phone number and home address.
Al FrankenAl Franken A monarch should be ever intent on conquest, lest his neighbours rise in arms against him.
AkbarAkbar I don’t know what it’s like to be an arm amputee, or have even one flesh-and-bone leg, or to have cerebral palsy.
Aimee MullinsAimee Mullins