“People lucky enough to live in the vicinity of an industrial hog farm are, with each breath, made keenly aware of the cause of their declining property values.”

I’m part of the mushball middle. I consider ‘confused’ the majority position because, thankfully.

Today I will masterbate! Okay, that was a mistake. I should have written “Today I will masterbate–if I want to!

When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both.

I like the liberal tradition; I like the Hubert Humphrey tradition fighting for civil rights.

But God told me that He/She/It had actually chosen Al Gore by making sure that Gore won the popular vote and, God thought, the Electoral College. ‘That worked for everyone else,’ God said.

Rush Limbaugh is what I call a disinfotainer. He entertains by spreading disinformation.

I’ve been a producer and led people. Also, being a comedian, you’re under pressure.

I’m sure I’ve devoted enough thought to Rush Limbaugh for one lifetime.

Call-time has renewed my faith in the need for public financing of elections. Call-time is where I as the candidate, sit in a room with my “call-time manager,” and a phone. Then I call people and ask them for money. For hours. Apparently, I’m really good at it.

The right wing has had a radio apparatus for years and years, so they’ve had minor leagues.

And I think that being able to make people laugh and write a book that’s funny makes the information go down a lot easier and it makes it a lot more fun to read, easier to understand, and often stronger. So there’s all kinds of advantages to it.

It was hard for him to project who he is, the person people know in private.

Good schools for me to prepare myself for a career, and, if I worked hard and played by the rules, a chance for me to do anything I wanted.

Asking the question whether the mainstream media has a liberal or conservative bias is like asking whether al Qaeda uses too much oil in their hummus.

I didn’t realize he meant our nation.

Armed with nothing more than a Facebook user’s phone number and home address.

It’s hard to breathe when she is not around.

Take a deep breath, feel. Now let it all go.

Sometimes, you need to stop from what you’re doing, take a deep breath, and remind yourself of who you are and what you want to be.

Every year, every moment, every breath & every blink can be a new beginning.

The best way to deal with jealousy is to just recognize it first if it comes up, breath with it and let it go.

My heart beats as much as I can breathe.

Life is short, we never when it’ll be our last breath.

Power in firebending comes from the breath, not the muscle!