“I want to point out, that this is not my fault that everyone’s afraid of me, because I did not kill a couple people the other day.”

I was raised by a single dad, so I’ve always just kind of liked “guys” stuff. I think my dad just took me to the things he was interested in.

I actually wanted to be an attorney. I did do things on the side like improv and sketch comedy, but law was my focus. I was a very bookish, academic kid. When I got out of college,

I’m just myself, so I don’t know that I think of myself as a nerd icon.

My parents were vegetarians. I’d show up at school, this giant black kid, with none of the cool clothes and a tofu sandwich and celery sticks.

I’m my own boss and my boss is a total ass.

I take the most wrenchingly painful moments of my life, brush them off and present them for the amusement of others. Luckily for me, my childhood was torture.

I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living.

Every ethnic group has this where people within it will try and tell each other how they should be.

They always say some women like to fix people. I don’t like to fix people, but you like a challenge.

If you haven’t noticed yet, working sucks. Unless you are a racecar driver or an astronaut or Beyonce, working is completely and utterly devoid of awesome.

When I get old and slow down I want to look behind me and see all the fire and the wreckage and no stone left unturned.

Marriage isn’t a carnival ride.

On general principle, I boycott shows that don’t employ actors.

I’m just going to be the best version of me that I could possibly be and be as funny as I possibly can.

I think diversity in television is important. It’s not about trying to fill a quota or satisfy some idea of diversity.

Maybe the nails are a little stubby and gnawed on, but I definitely do not have man hands.

Healing is like dealing with the moods of the moon. Somedays you feel the pain at its fullest and you don’t know how to make it through it, and other days it feels a little bit more bearable.

What a funny world we live in people live their days in pursuit of filling their hands with things only to depart this life empty handed.

He lit a lamp in broad daylight and said, as he went about-I am looking for a human.

I had become aware, as early as my college days, that no opinion, however absurd and incredible can be imagined, that has not been held by one of the philosophers.

Will you preach to your former self? Leave your old habits on the shelf? shed the skin of days gone by. A human butterfly.

Insomnia is revenge for the thoughts we have refused to have in the day.

Will you seize the day or waste it away? The finitude of time always on the mind. Will you see your future glory, or will you still remain blind?

There will never be a day, I am not thankful for the fire you brought to my life that still warms me to the bones.