Men are only as loyal as their options.
BILL MAHERLittle do women know what big ideas I have in my pants.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make in order to become the wiser person we became.
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Is it [hunting] really a sport if you have all the equipment and your opponent doesn’t know a game is going on?
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Again, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don’t pay attention.
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Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
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To those people who say, ‘My father is alive because of animal experimentation,’ I say, ‘Yeah, well, good for you. This dog died so your father could live.’ Sorry, but I am just not behind that kind of trade-off.
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Did you see the 2000 Republican Presidential Convention? The last time the Republicans had that many Black people on a stage, they were selling them!
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There is no debate here, just scientists and non-scientists. And since the subject is science, the non-scientists don’t get a vote.
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I have always defined political correctness as an elevation of sensitivity over truth.
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In an average moral universal society, good people will try to do the right thing, and psychotic people will do wicked things. But if you want to make good people do wicked things, you need them to be religious.
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What I believe in is love your neighbor as yourself and don’t call him stupid because they don’t agree with you politically.
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When opportunity knocks all some people can do is complain about the noise.
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You can’t pray away global warming, and that’s the difference between religious people and sane people.
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To most Christians, the Bible is like a software license. Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click ‘I Agree’.
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There’s a phrase we live by in America: “In God We Trust”. It’s right there where Jesus would want it: on our money.
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Religion is insanity by consensus.
BILL MAHER