The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.
BILL MAHERThat’s what’s so great about the Internet. It allows pompous blow-hards to connect with other pompous blow-hards in a vast circle-jerk of pomposity.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.
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Religion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don’t need.
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False hope really makes you cynical.
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To those people who say, ‘My father is alive because of animal experimentation,’ I say, ‘Yeah, well, good for you. This dog died so your father could live.’ Sorry, but I am just not behind that kind of trade-off.
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It’s very hard not to be condescending when you’re explaining something to an idiot.
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In the Republican party, crazy is a constituency.
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Talk to women who’ve ever dated an Arab man. The results are not good.
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That’s what’s so great about the Internet. It allows pompous blow-hards to connect with other pompous blow-hards in a vast circle-jerk of pomposity.
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Little do women know what big ideas I have in my pants.
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I think what’s dangerous is the idea that someone can wash away your sins.
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In Europe, Socialism is just another political party. It just means that government takes over certain things like hospitals, prisons, military and schools that should not be run for profit.
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I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else do you make a country better but by pointing out its flaws?
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I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.
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Again, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don’t pay attention.
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A new cologne is coming out. It’s for cowboys, and it’s made from cow’s manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!
BILL MAHER