“The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.”

Real loss is only possible when you love something more than you love yourself.

Sometimes you got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It’s called fun.

When I was growing up they used to say, “Robin, drugs can kill you.” Now that I’m 58 my doctor’s telling me, “Robin, you need drugs to live.” I realize now that my doctor is also my dealer.

My battles with addiction definitely shaped how I am now. They really made me deeply appreciate human contact. And the value of friends and family, how precious that is.

To live would be an awfully big adventure.

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.

There’s a time for daring and there’s a time for caution, and a wise man understands which is called for.

We used to be hunter-gatherers, now we’re shopper-borrowers.

I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.

To be free. Such a thing would be greater than all the magic and all the treasures in all the world.

Death – to blink for an exceptionally long period of time.

Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’

Cricket is basically baseball on valium.

You have to break in half to love somebody.

Please, don’t worry so much. Because in the end, none of us have very long on this Earth. Life is fleeting.

She is not perfect. You are not perfect. The question is whether or not you are perfect for each other.

Many times drugs and alcohol – there’s a technical term that they’re called, emotional suppressants – are the only things that can help a person survive and get through and be able to deal with their pain.

I’m high off the indo creepin’ with the quickness to the cut, bust one to his head while he munches on that donut.

My justification is that most people my age spend a lot of time thinking about what they’re going to do for the next five or ten years. The time they spend thinking about their life, I just spend drinking.

Alright, remember, alcohol equals puke equals smelly mess equals nobody likes you.

Romance is a dream. I can get better shit at the liquor store.

The Long Red Road is a story about alcoholism and dysfunction and tragic tale of a man who’s trying to drink himself to death on an Indian reservation in Dakota. It was written for me, so it’s something I would love to do.

I liked you better when you were drunk .

Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right.