black
grey
blue
red
brown
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I must have a drink of breakfast.

W. C. Fields

I never met a kid I liked.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself One Liner
I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. FIELDS

Age Food Myself Need
Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually.
W. C. FIELDS

Born Lose People
When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Togetherness
There’s no such thing as a tough child – if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Parents Tough
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Myself Wine
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. FIELDS

Face Man Time
It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Funny Old World
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Hands Myself See
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. FIELDS

Worth Wrong
I like children. If they’re properly cooked.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Food Myself
Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
Yes I do like children, Girl children, about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself Woman
Anyone who hates children and animals can’t be all bad.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Bad Children Hate

I must have a drink of breakfast.

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I must have a drink of breakfast.

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