I have an only child. She’s so independent and good with adults.
TIM ALLENI’m a very bad student, but a great learner.
More Tim Allen Quotes
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Real men don’t use instructions, son. Besides, this is just the manufacturer’s opinion on how to put this together.
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I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that’s a good thing.
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I am a thespian trapped in a man’s body.
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The big advantage to playing the Venetian in Las Vegas – where it’s a beautiful theater – is that unlike other places, even many other nice venues, I can do a set and lighting cues, I can put on a real show. I can dress up, wear a tux.
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When you’re 6 or 7, your father becomes this wonderful presence in your life. I really responded to my father. And then, the very moment I realized that I loved him unconditionally, that life was going to be great just because he was in it, he was gone.
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You don’t know what people are really like until they’re under a lot of stress.
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For years, I just did not like this idea of God, church.
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Sometimes you get the sense that the Creator is getting to that point of “Yeah, we might have to reboot.”
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I wonder if to stare into the face of God will drive me crazy. (I wonder who would blink first.)
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Man is the only animal to borrow tools.
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Men often do things for women that they don’t want to do, so that women will do things for men that they don’t want to do.
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Kids learn by example. If I respect Mom, they’re going to respect Mom.
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I had a very easy time loving an audience. But when it’s one-on-one with somebody, all I wanted to do was run away, because maybe they’re going to want something from me I can’t give, or they’re going to hurt me.
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But separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.
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When I went to jail, reality hit so hard that it took my breath away, took my stance away, took my strength away. I was there buck naked, humiliated, sitting in my own crap and urine – this is a metaphor. My ego had run off. Your ego is the biggest coward.
TIM ALLEN