I do a lot of family shows.
TIM ALLENA guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.
More Tim Allen Quotes
-
-
Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we’ve always had: work, or prison.
TIM ALLEN -
Before Kady was born, I didn’t think having a kid would be such a big deal. My attitude was simple: Babies are nice, play with them, put them in the closet until the next time.
TIM ALLEN -
I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children.
TIM ALLEN -
Why go to a church to worship God? A church is man made. God never said, “And let there be aluminum siding.” Climbing a tree to talk to God sounds like a better idea since only God can make a tree. And if that tree’s on a golf course, all the better.
TIM ALLEN -
But separate a man from his car – that’s inhuman.
TIM ALLEN -
I’m a creative guy, artistically with graphics.
TIM ALLEN -
Comedy is the ultimate anarchist.
TIM ALLEN -
I’m one of these guys that just spoils the environment. I like ATVs and snowmobiles. I have a motorcycle up there, and I like cruising through the hills.
TIM ALLEN -
Use a screwdriver instead of a hammer. Try to untighten the nut with your hand. Utilize the path of least resistance first.
TIM ALLEN -
I know it sounds odd, but I want to make a Rolex-quality screwdriver.
TIM ALLEN -
Be wary of listening to stories secondhand.
TIM ALLEN -
My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
TIM ALLEN -
I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid. I’ve never gotten over it.
TIM ALLEN -
I used to live an isolated existence, even in relationships, but now my family knows me for who I really am. Mostly, that’s a good thing.
TIM ALLEN -
Women are brilliant. Every woman knows how to do the weirdest thing right out of the bucket. Every woman knows how to do that Hindu head wrap with the towel out of the shower. Ever try to do that? You look like a drunk Iraqi soldier.
TIM ALLEN