I guess I wouldn’t believe in anything if it weren’t for my lucky astrology mood watch.
STEVE MARTINI believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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You can’t really conduct your life by one or two phrases.
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The greatest thing you can do is surprise yourself.
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I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
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The banjo is such a happy instrument–you can’t play a sad song on the banjo – it always comes out so cheerful.
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I could never be a woman, ’cause I’d just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
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Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.
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Acting is collaborative because you are working with another actor, and it’s almost like a two-man juggling team. You have to really be in sync.
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I have found that– just as in real life–imagination sometimes has to stand in for experience.
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be.
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How many people have never raised their hand before?
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No art comes from the conscious mind.
STEVE MARTIN






