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When I was 20, I used to go around telling stories, and I knew where I was comfortable – onstage, talking, making ’em laugh and listen to the weirdest things. I liked being the center of attention.

Ron White

If I see someone out there mouthing the words to a bit, I’m not having fun.
RON WHITE

Fun Have Mouth See Someone Word
I’ve been married a few times. I’m not good at it.
RON WHITE

Few Good Married Time
Let’s face it: a lot of my material comes from the stuff that happens to me on the road.
RON WHITE

Come Face Happen Let Lot Material More Road Stuff
There are two kinds of comics; there are the ones who build bridges, and then there are the people who walk across the bridges as though they built them. The bridge builders are few and far between.
RON WHITE

Across Bridge Build Comic Kinda One People Through Two Walk
People, when they go on stage, tend to be animated and try to force things out instead of relaxing and bringing it in.
RON WHITE

Animate Bring Force Instead People Relax Stage Tend Thing
I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.
RON WHITE

Doctor Drywall Get Hanger Lawyer Mall Over Plumber World
You can tell on-stage when a joke’s starting to lose its pop. It doesn’t mean people don’t want to hear it anymore; it means I don’t want to do it anymore. Because I want to move on to something that has a knee-jerk reaction just like you get when you tell somebody a joke that they’ve never heard.
RON WHITE

Anymore Call Hear Joke Lose Mean People Pop Stage Start Tell Want
It never dawned on me that I had the option of becoming a comedian. I come from a little dirt street town in northwest Texas, and they really don’t talk about the arts there much on career day.
RON WHITE

Become Comedy Dirt Drawn Little Northwest Option Street Tear Town
Comedy is great because there’s no overhead.
RON WHITE

Comedy Great No Overhead
I’ve asked these guys in rock bands with all the 18-wheelers driving to the venue how they make money. I just don’t understand it. But I don’t understand a lot of things.
RON WHITE

Ask Band Guy Monkey Rock Understand Venue
I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
RON WHITE

Cigar Collection Go Great Imply Last Smoke
All of my comedian friends are some of the best joke writers in the world.
RON WHITE

Best Comedian Friend Joke Some World Write
I was always a funny guy. I don’t think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn’t a funny guy when they were young.
RON WHITE

Always Anybody Funny Guy Make Stand Young
Comedy is all about the pause.
RON WHITE

Al Comedy Pause
I was a huge fan of comedy when I was a child.
RON WHITE

Child Comedy Fan Huge
Somebody the other day had a review, called me ‘America’s reprobate.’ And I don’t even know what that means, but I kinda like the way it sounds.
RON WHITE

Call Country Day Kinds Know Like Mean Other Reprobate Somebody Way

When I was 20, I used to go around telling stories, and I knew where I was comfortable – onstage, talking, making ’em laugh and listen to the weirdest things. I liked being the center of attention.

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When I was 20, I used to go around telling stories, and I knew where I was comfortable – onstage, talking, making ’em laugh and listen to the weirdest things. I liked being the center of attention.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Ron White Quotes