You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
RON WHITEI was a comedy fan when I was a little kid.
More Ron White Quotes
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I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.
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I loved listening to laughter even as a little kid.
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But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It’s like anything else. It’s a muscle you have to exercise. I write more now than ever.
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Pace, rhythm and timing. Pace, rhythm and timing is what it’s about. The content’s got to be great, but then it’s got to be delivered. It’s a tricky thing to do, and it takes a lot of work.
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It never dawned on me that I had the option of becoming a comedian. I come from a little dirt street town in northwest Texas, and they really don’t talk about the arts there much on career day.
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I’m not willing to drag my fans down a road I don’t believe in. That’s just my one little principle. I’ve only got one, and that’s it.
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I didn’t get where I am today by worryin’ about how I’d feel tomorrow.
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I get e-mail from all over the world, and from lawyers and doctors and whoever – plumbers and drywall hangers.
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My life has been wild enough to derive all of the stories you need out of it. I’ve been through many, many years of behavioral problems, so I don’t really look outside for stories.
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I think honest communication, no matter where it comes from, is positive for a relationship.
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I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
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I guarantee there’s people who watch television who have no idea how complicated it is to make a television show.
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Mother, she likes the blue material just fine.
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I consider it an honor and a privilege to give back however I can for the many sacrifices of these incredibly brave men and women.
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We always go out looking for live music after our shows.
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That’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.
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There’s not a pill you can take; there’s not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.
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Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
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I was always a funny guy. I don’t think anybody that makes it to this level of stand-up wasn’t a funny guy when they were young.
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My shows are not all-the-way filthy, but they can be.
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A killer Cuban restaurant with a giant cigar bar. Have me a Cuban sandwich. That’s just like heaven to me. I’m a simple man.
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If you become famous and don’t have a live show to back it up, they’re not going to pay you any money.
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I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
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I was so in love with the idea of making people laugh for a living that I didn’t care what I had to do to get there. Or how much money I was going to make when I did get there.
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I don’t like to do material people have heard. Now, they like to hear material that they know, because that’s the stuff that made me famous, and, unfortunately, I don’t do a ton of it.
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There’s no idea or concept in comedy you could do that hasn’t been attacked from some angle. But if you start leaving punchlines out so you’ll look cool, I don’t get that. But I don’t watch standup anyway, so I don’t know what they’re doing.
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