Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
RON WHITEMovies are boring. It’s like watching paint dry. I did a little role in a movie, and it was eight lines. I was there for three days. It’s just horrible.
More Ron White Quotes
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I do a lot of gay-friendly stuff in my show, and men, women, they all love it. I practice non-judgment in my daily life and hope other people do the same thing.
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I’ve been married a few times. I’m not good at it.
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I loved listening to laughter even as a little kid.
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Movies are boring. It’s like watching paint dry. I did a little role in a movie, and it was eight lines. I was there for three days. It’s just horrible.
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TV is a hard job. You work 15 hours a day. People tell you what to do. I hate to do it.
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I would have rather been beat by a plumber than Kathy Griffin.
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I’m not the judge of who that is, but I am a believer that no debt in the universe goes unpaid. If you try to buy early, you’ll pay late.
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There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
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There’s no backlog of people we can fire for no reason and act as if they don’t exist.
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My show is more storytelling now than it’s ever been. It’s what I’m good at.
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My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
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I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
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A lot of people can find something to laugh at in my humor, I guess.
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A killer Cuban restaurant with a giant cigar bar. Have me a Cuban sandwich. That’s just like heaven to me. I’m a simple man.
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I think the world has their own good, clean, Christian comedy. They don’t need my help.
RON WHITE