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When in doubt, go for the dick joke.

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Change is not popular; we are creatures of habit as human beings. ‘I want it to be the way it was.’ But if you continue the way it was there will be no ‘is.’
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Change Creature Habit Human Popular Want
You need a touch of madness, just enough that you don’t become stupid!
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Enough Madness Stupid Touch
Comedy is acting out optimism.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Acting Comedy One Liner Optimism
Don’t mess with me, man, I’m a lawyer!
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Lawyer Man Mess
To be free. Such a thing would be greater than all the magic and all the treasures in all the world.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Freedom Greatness Inspirational Let Go Magic Treasure World
The human body was designed by a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Body Design Human Science Toxic Waste
You treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you’ll win, no matter what the outcome.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Disease Guarrantee Outcome Person Philosophy Treatment Win
After I quit drinking, I realized I am the same asshole I always was; I just have fewer dents in my car.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Alcohol Asshole Car Quit Realize
Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you are making too much money.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Drug God Humour Money
I like my wine like my women – ready to pass out.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Funny Marriage Wife Wine Women
The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, ‘Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses.’ She’s got a baseball bat and yelling, You want a piece of me?
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Baseball Funny Liberty Poor Statue Tired
My children give me a great sense of wonder. Just to see them develop into these extraordinary human beings.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Children Development-q Extraordinary Greatness Human Sense Wonder
But if there’s love, dear – those are the ties that bind, and you’ll have a family in your heart, forever.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Blind Family Forever Heart Love
Politics: Poli a Latin word meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking creatures.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Creature Humour Politics
Politics is so personal, vicious and immediate, how are you going to get anything done? Even the local politics where I live have gotten so ugly.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Done Immediate Live Personal Politics Ugly
I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Agree Positive Sorry

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