Humour Quotes

The world needs banking but it does not need banks.

Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

She’s the sort of woman who lives for others – you can tell the others by their hunted expression.

There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man’s notion that he is less savage than the other savages.

It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.

If someone were to harm my family or a friend or somebody I love, I would eat them. I might end up in jail for 500 years, but I would eat them.

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called Ego.

It’s nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don’t want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it’s a little like saving sex for your old age.

I love only one girl, one in every town.

Because of humour we are less overwhelmed by the vicissitudes of life.