Funny Quotes

An assorted collection of quotes on Funny with high quality images that will help you to relate with the right words. Quotes are the rythmical creation of words. Download and share this collection of Funny quotes with your firiends, family and loved ones on social media platforms.

It’s a funny thing… but people mostly have it backward. They think they live by what they want. But really, what guides them is what they’re afraid of. What they don’t want.
KHALED HOSSEINI

Afraid Deep Funny Guide Live People Wisdom
Random thought of the day: I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m a fuck up.
JUICE WRLD

Conclusion Fuck Funny Random
A sense of humor is the only divine quality of man.
ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER

Divine Funny Man Quality
Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
ALBERT CAMUS

Funny Lecture People Sleeping
A clever arrangement of bad eggs will never make a good omelet.
C. S. LEWIS

Arrangement Bad Clever Egg Funny Goodness
April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.
MARK TWAIN

Fun Funny Human Nature Humour Kiding
Jazz isn’t dead. It just smells funny.
FRANK ZAPPA

Dead Funny Jazz Music Smell
If we do an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, we will be a blind and toothless nation.
MARTIN LUTHER KING JR

Blind Eyes Funny Humour Nation Teeth
Design is a funny word. Some people think design means how it looks. But of course, if you dig deeper, it’s really how it works.
STEVE JOBS

Business Design Funny People Work
Woman of my dreams, I don’t sleep so I can’t find her.
LIL WAYNE

Dream Funny Herself Myself Woman
50% of all married people are women.
YOGI BERRA

Funny Marriage One Liner People Women
Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
STEPHEN HAWKING

Funny Happiness Humour Life Man Marriage
You know, a balance-sheet is like a bikini, it shows more but it hides what is vital. I learnt to read a balance sheet and then I got fascinated by stocks.
RAKESH JHUNJHUNWALA

Business Clothes Funny Hide Important Investment Learning Mathematics Myself Reading Stock
What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say.
RALPH WALDO EMERSON

Funny Hear Insult Loud Speak
Life is funny. Things change, people change, but you will always be you, so stay true to yourself and never sacrifice who you are for anyone.
ZAYN MALIK

Change Cute Funny Life People Sacrifice True Yourself
Whenever things seem to start going well in your life, the Devil comes along and gives you a ‘girlfriend’.
ROBERT MUGABE

Devil Funny Girlfriend Life
On one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women.
H. L. MENCKEN

Funny Issues Man Trust Women
I had sex with a prostitute when I was 21, I was so bad, she gave me a refund.
ROBIN WILLIAMS

Funny Prostitute Refund Sex
I’m so insecure, I think, that I’ll die before I drink.
OLIVIA RODRIGO

Alcohol Die Drink Funny Insecure Thinking
We do not stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing!
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN

Funny Grow Humour Life Play Reality
Thou shouldst eat to live; not live to eat.
SOCRATES

Deep Eat Funny Live One Liner
Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
NORM MACDONALD

Dog Friendship Funny Home Ideas Man See Thrill Walk Yourself
Money is what makes a man act funny.
EMINEM

Act Funny Man Money One Liner
I have better use for my brain than to poison it with alcohol. To put alcohol in the human brain is like putting sand in the bearings of an engine.
THOMAS EDISON

Alcohol Brain Engine Funny Human Poison Sand
I only drink Champagne on two occasions, when I am in love and when I am not.
COCO CHANEL

Champagne Funny Love Occasion
Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.
MARK TWAIN

Animal Blush Funny Man One Liner
What is politics? Political system is equal to development politics plus political politics.
A. P. J. ABDUL KALAM

Developmentment Funny Humour Politics

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