Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes. LEWIS GRIZZARD ChangeDogLeadershipLifeRace
I get letters from people who say, ‘What have you got against women?’ What could I possibly have against women? I’ve married three of them. LEWIS GRIZZARD LettersMarriagePeoplePossibleWoman
Yankees don’t understand that the Southern way of talking is a language of nuance. What we can do in the South is we can take a word and change it just a little bit and make it mean something altogether different. LEWIS GRIZZARD ChangeDifferentLanguageTalkUnderstandWord
There’s nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that. LEWIS GRIZZARD DirtyHardInheritanceRealitySex
I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence. LEWIS GRIZZARD EducationIntelligencePeople
Money doesn’t grow on trees, and if it did somebody else would own the orchard. LEWIS GRIZZARD FarmGrowMoneyTree
You call to a dog and a dog will break its neck to get to you. Dogs just want to please. Call to a cat and its attitude is, ‘What’s in it for me?’ LEWIS GRIZZARD AttitudeCatDog
