This would have been a great game to watch if we didn’t have any money on it.
NORM MACDONALDI generally have a real strong idea or a strong punchline, and I just try to get to it by rambling around, as I don’t like to memorize words.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it.
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When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
NORM MACDONALD -
Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
NORM MACDONALD -
Few people love with the violence they hate.
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In estimating the adversities of life, we would seldom have much reason to complain of the evils we suffer, did we understand the dangers we daily escape.
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He that searches for praise will often find contempt.
NORM MACDONALD -
Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
NORM MACDONALD -
A great cause of evil in the world is that men seldom think themselves criminal if they offer the same injustice to others that has been successfully practiced on themselves.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
NORM MACDONALD -
Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it’s the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
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We often suffer more from our fears, than from the dangers of our situation.
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There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
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The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
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I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
NORM MACDONALD -
I can’t be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I’ll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.
NORM MACDONALD






