On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.
JOAN RIVERSI was smart enough to go through any door that opened.
More Joan Rivers Quotes
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Some women take up the law and become lawyers. Other women lay down the law and become wives.
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To the pessimist the light at the end of the tunnel is another train.
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Happiness, at my age, is breathing
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Keep moving. It’s hard for old age to hit a moving target.
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I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, ‘Get the hell off my property.’
JOAN RIVERS -
I got a waterbed, but my husband stocked it with trout.
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Thank God we’re living in a country where the sky’s the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.
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Don’t worry about the money. Love the process.
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Florida wants to change the state’s motto to attract younger people. They’re thinking about: More than just a great place to die.
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I was smart enough to go through any door that opened.
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Why should a woman cook? So her husband can say ‘My wife makes a delicious cake’ to some hooker?
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My daughter and I are very close, we speak every single day and I call her every day and I say the same thing, “pick up, I know you’re there.”
JOAN RIVERS -
On the Vanna White diet, you only eat what you can spell.
JOAN RIVERS -
A female salmon lays three thousand eggs a year – and has yet to receive a Mother’s Day card from one of them.
JOAN RIVERS -
I was born in 1962, and the room next to me was 1963.
JOAN RIVERS






