Many people are in despair because their dreams didn’t come true, and they despair even more that they did not make them come true.
IRVIN D. YALOMThe death anxiety of many people is fueled … by disappointment at never having fulfilled their potential.
More Irvin D. Yalom Quotes
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If we climb high enough, we will reach a height from which tragedy ceases to look tragic.
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Specialness as a primary mode of death transcendence takes a number of other maladaptive forms.
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We take pleasure not only in the growth of our patient but also in the ripple effect—the salutary influence our patients have upon those whom they touch in life.
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Your greatest instrument is you, yourself, and the work of self-understanding is endless. I’m still learning.
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The more unlived your life, the greater your death anxiety.
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Not to take possession of your life plan is to let your existence be an accident.
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Some have expressed the very opposite feeling–the fear that they would not be interesting enough to write about.
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Perhaps the single most important therapeutic credo that I have is that the unexamined life is not worth living.
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There is some evidence, for example, that those who enter the death-related professions (soldiers, doctors, priests, and morticians) may in part be motivated by a need to obtain control over death anxiety.
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Pandora’s box, but to re-enter life in a richer, more compassionate manner.
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Living safely is dangerous.
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The more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death.
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Psychotherapy is a cyclical process from isolation into relationship. It is cyclical because the patient, in terror of existential isolation, relates deeply and meaningfully to the therapist and then, strengthened by this encounter, is led back again to a confrontation with existential isolation.
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Death anxiety is the mother of all religions, which, in one way or another, attempt to temper the anguish of our finitude.
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There was a time in our lives when we were so close that nothing seemed to obstruct our friendship and brotherhood, and only a small footbridge separated us.
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A curious thought experiment. . . Nietzsche’s message to us was to live life in such a way that we would be willing to repeat the same life eternally
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There are borderlines and there are borderlines. Labels do violence to people. You can’t treat the label; you have to treat the person behind the label. (17)
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It is wrong to bear children out of need, wrong to use a child to alleviate loneliness, wrong to provide purpose in life by reproducing another copy of oneself. It is wrong also to seek immortality by spewing one’s germ into the future as though sperm contains your consciousness!
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The spirit of a man is constructed out of his choices.
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Love is not just a passion spark between two people; there is infinite difference between falling in love and standing in love.
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You will search the world over and not find a nonsuperstitious community. As long as there is ignorance, there will be adherence to superstition. Dispelling ignorance is the only solution. That is why I teach.
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The death anxiety of many people is fueled … by disappointment at never having fulfilled their potential.
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What? ‘Borderline patients play games’? That what you said? Ernest, you’ll never be a real therapist if you think like that. That’s exactly what I meant earlier when I talked about the dangers of diagnosis.
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Every person must choose how much truth he can stand.
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Death loses its terror if one dies when one has consummated one’s life!
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When that person dies, the whole cluster dies,too, vanishes from the living memory. I wonder who that person will be for me. Whose death will make me truly dead?
IRVIN D. YALOM