Rather, love is a way of being, a “giving to,” not a ‘falling for”; a mode of relating at large, not an act limited to a single person.
IRVIN D. YALOMI dream of a love that is more than two people craving to possess one another.
More Irvin D. Yalom Quotes
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Were not teaching our students the importance of relationships with other people: how you work with them, what the relational pathology consists of, how you examine your own conscience, how you examine the inner world, how you examine your dreams.
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The more you fail to experience your life fully, the more you will fear death.
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Live right, he reminded himself, and have faith that good things will flow from you even if you never learn of them.
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I must stop him from being one of those who call themselves good because they have no claws.
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Pandora’s box, but to re-enter life in a richer, more compassionate manner.
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Just as you were about to step on it, I asked you “Do you want to cross the footbridge to me?” – Immediately you did not want to anymore; and when I asked you again you remained silent.
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Since then mountains and torrential rivers and whatever separates and alienates have been cast between us, and even if we wanted to get together, we couldn’t. But when you now think of that little footbridge, words fail you and you sob and marvel.
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A free man who lives among the ignorant strives as far as he can to avoid their favors. A free man acts honestly, not deceptively.
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The act of revealing oneself fully to another and still being accepted may be the major vehicle of therapeutic help.
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What? ‘Borderline patients play games’? That what you said? Ernest, you’ll never be a real therapist if you think like that. That’s exactly what I meant earlier when I talked about the dangers of diagnosis.
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Living safely is dangerous.
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This is what makes us human. But it comes with a costly price: the wound of mortality. Our existence is forever shadowed by the knowledge that we will grow, blossom, and, inevitably, diminish and die.
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The creative members of an orthodoxy, any orthodoxy, ultimately outgrow their disciplines.
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Heidegger makes the distinction between being absorbed in the way things are in the world and being aware that things are in the world.
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Only the wounded healer can truly heal. (97)
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A curious thought experiment. . . Nietzsche’s message to us was to live life in such a way that we would be willing to repeat the same life eternally
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One comprehends oneself in order not to be preoccupied with oneself.
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I think my quarry is illusion. I war against magic. I believe that, though illusion often cheers and comforts, it ultimately and invariably weakens and constricts the spirit.
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When we have forgotten ourselves and become absorbed in someone (or something) outside ourselves
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If people in their 20s had more death awareness, would that in fact temper their ambition or drive?
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The path to decision may be hard because it leads into the territory of both finiteness and groundlessness—domains soaked in anxiety.
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Absolute power, as we have always known, corrupts absolutely; it corrupts because it does not do the trick for the individual.
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He had learned long ago that, in general, the easier it was for anxious patients to reach him, the less likely they were to call. (107)
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The drive for power is not uncommonly motivated by this dynamic. One’s own fear and sense of limitation is avoided by enlarging oneself and one’s sphere of control.
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Marriage and its entourage of possession and jealousy enslave the spirit.
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A focus on this deep dissatisfaction is often the starting point in overcoming death anxiety.
IRVIN D. YALOM