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There’s no better way to become a disintegrated character than to be your own authority.

Henry Cloud

The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.
HENRY CLOUD

Adjust Fools Himself Truth
Marriage is not slavery. It is based on a love relationship deeply rooted in freedom. Each partner is free from the other and therefore free to love the other. Where there is control, or perception of control, there is not love. Love only exists where there is freedom.
HENRY CLOUD

Control Freedom Love Marriage Partner Relationship Slave
Dating is a give and take. If you only see it as “Taking,” you are not getting it.
HENRY CLOUD

Date Equality Yourself
Things don’t change in a marriage until the spouse who is taking responsibility for a problem that is not hers decides to say or do something about it.
HENRY CLOUD

Change Decision Marriage Responsibility
A culture is like an immune system. It operates through the laws of systems, just like a body. If a body has an infection, the immune system deals with it. Similarly, a group enforces its norms, either actively or passively.
HENRY CLOUD

Active Culture Group Immunity Infection System
The mature person meets the demands of life, while the immature person demands that life meet her demands.
HENRY CLOUD

Demand Life Mature Person
We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.
HENRY CLOUD

Behavior Change Motivational Ourselves Pain
We all make mistakes, but the people who thrive from their mistakes are the successful ones.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
Anger is frustration at the fact that we are not God, and do not have control over reality.
HENRY CLOUD

Angry Control Fact Frustration Ourselves Reality
Just as we leave the effects of our work behind in results, we leave the effects of our interactions with people in their hearts, minds, and souls.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
The human heart will seek to be known, understood, and connected with above all else. If you do not connect, the ones you care about will find someone who will.
HENRY CLOUD

Connection Finding Heart Human Known Seek Willing
Who a person is will ultimately determine if their brains, talents, competencies, energy, effort, deal-making abilities, and opportunities will succeed.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur
If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.
HENRY CLOUD

Community Group Health People Surround Yourself
You have to be able to face losing some things you might want in order to be free to do the right thing.
HENRY CLOUD

Face Freedom Lose Order Right
A good test of a relationship is how a person responds to the word ‘no.’ Love respects ‘no,’ control does not.
HENRY CLOUD

Control Goodness Person Reaction Relationship Respond Test
A leader’s responsibility is to cause a vision and mission to have tangible results in the real world.
HENRY CLOUD

Anand Thakur

There’s no better way to become a disintegrated character than to be your own authority.

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There’s no better way to become a disintegrated character than to be your own authority.

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