Things don’t change in a marriage until the spouse who is taking responsibility for a problem that is not hers decides to say or do something about it.
HENRY CLOUDDont use all-or-nothing thinking. Take each day as its own day, and dont worry about it if you mess up one day. The most important thing you can do is just get back up on the horse.
More Henry Cloud Quotes
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Good pain is pain in the service of a purpose. Bad pain is pain endured because we are resisting a needed growth step.
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The sad thing is that many of us come to Christ because we are sinners, and then spend the rest of our lives trying to pretend that we are not!
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One of the worst things you can die with is potential.
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Dating is a give and take. If you only see it as “Taking,” you are not getting it.
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Dating is about finding out who you are and who others are. If you show up in a masquerade outfit, neither is going to happen.
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In the end, as a leader, you are always going to get a combination of two things: what you create and what you allow.
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Diligence is not easy, but we can’t reach our goals without it.
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Be Hard on the issue, Soft on the person.
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Just as we leave the effects of our work behind in results, we leave the effects of our interactions with people in their hearts, minds, and souls.
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To get greater than 100% return on a growth step, give up defensiveness. Defensiveness stifles performance, and destroys relationships.
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There is a difference between solitude and isolation. One is connected and one isn’t. Solitude replenishes, isolation diminishes.
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If people are really narcissistic or have a need to be seen as more than they really are, or to be admired as having it all together, then they cannot be followed and trusted by others.
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People tend to look at dating sort of like a safari – like they’re trying to land the trophy.
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When truth presents itself, the wise person see the light, takes it in, and makes adjustments. The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.
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Independence is not an option for us. Remember, God existed without us.
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We have our own thoughts, and if we want others to know them, we must tell them.
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The amount of truth a relationship can handle is proportional to the amount of perceived love that’s present.
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You have to be able to face losing some things you might want in order to be free to do the right thing.
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Dating is primarily a numbers game. People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That’s just the way it is.
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The natural response to evaluation is to feel judged. We have to mature to a place where we respond to it with gratitude, and love feedback.
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We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.
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If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you ‘do’ boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.
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Endings are a part of life, and we are actually wired to execute them. But because of trauma, developmental failures, and other reasons, we shy away from the steps that could open up whole new worlds of development and growth.
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To grow, we need things that we do not have and cannot provide, and we need to have a source of those things who looks favorably upon us and who does things for us for our own good.
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Everything has seasons, and we have to be able to recognize when something’s time has passed and be able to move into the next season. Everything that is alive requires pruning as well, which is a great metaphor for endings.
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You aren’t alive if you aren’t in need.
HENRY CLOUD