If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you ‘do’ boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.
HENRY CLOUDFor someone’s character to grow, it has to be free from internal attack. Falling down never stopped children from developing. But getting yelled at, criticized, and put down can stop them for life.
More Henry Cloud Quotes
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Everything has seasons, and we have to be able to recognize when something’s time has passed and be able to move into the next season. Everything that is alive requires pruning as well, which is a great metaphor for endings.
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The mature person meets the demands of life, while the immature person demands that life meet her demands.
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Encourage literally came from “in courage.” The courage is put “into” you from outside. Our character and abilities grow through internalizing from others what we do not possess in ourselves.
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Couples often live out years of falsehood trying to protect and save a relationship, all the while destroying any chance of real relationship.
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Dating is a place to practice how to relate to other people.
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If you want to become healthy, you have to surround yourself with a group of people that are getting healthy and you have to be connected to a community that is doing what you want to do.
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To rescue people from the natural consequences of their behavior is to render them powerless.
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In a very real way, ownership is the essence of leadership. When you are ridiculously in charge, then you own whatever happens in a company, school.
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Leadership is not taken, it is given. People give leadership to those that they trust. They allow people that they trust to have influence over their lives.
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Spouses in healthy relationships cherish each other’s space and are champions of each other’s causes.
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In the end, as a leader, you are always going to get a combination of two things: what you create and what you allow.
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Christianity is not about morality. It’s about reality.
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Things don’t change in a marriage until the spouse who is taking responsibility for a problem that is not hers decides to say or do something about it.
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I’m not an expert in the sociological realities of all the pastors in the world, but I would say that there are some very, very positive things about the state of integrity in church leaders.
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The extent to which two people in a relationship can bring up and resolve issues is a critical marker of the soundness of a relationship.
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Good pain is pain in the service of a purpose. Bad pain is pain endured because we are resisting a needed growth step.
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We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.
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It is true that you get what you tolerate.
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A person who hasn’t grieved a significant loss has unfinished business inside and can cause others great grief as a result.
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To get greater than 100% return on a growth step, give up defensiveness. Defensiveness stifles performance, and destroys relationships.
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When truth presents itself, the wise person see the light, takes it in, and makes adjustments. The fool tries to adjust the truth so he does not have to adjust to it.
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Dating is about finding out who you are and who others are. If you show up in a masquerade outfit, neither is going to happen.
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You have to be able to face losing some things you might want in order to be free to do the right thing.
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If you are building a culture where honest expectations are communicated and peer accountability is the norm, then the group will address poor performance and attitudes.
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For someone’s character to grow, it has to be free from internal attack. Falling down never stopped children from developing. But getting yelled at, criticized, and put down can stop them for life.
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Who a person is will ultimately determine if their brains, talents, competencies, energy, effort, deal-making abilities, and opportunities will succeed.
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