The kind of man who demands that government enforce his ideas is always the kind whose ideas are idiotic.
H. L. MENCKENUnder democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule—and both commonly succeed, and are right.
More H. L. Mencken Quotes
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You can’t do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.
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The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth.
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The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.
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All government, in its essence, is a conspiracy against the superior man: its one permanent object is to oppress him and cripple him.
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On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.
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Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
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It is the classic fallacy of our time that a moron run through a university and decorated with a Ph.D. will thereby cease to be a moron.
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A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.
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Always remember this: If you don’t attend the funerals of your friends, they will certainly not attend yours.
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A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
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For every problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
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The one permanent emotion of the inferior man is fear – fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexplicable. What he wants above everything else is safety.
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It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.
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The only thing wrong with Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address was that it was the South, not the North, that was fighting for a government of the people, by the people and for the people.
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Freedom of press is limited to those who own one.
H. L. MENCKEN