Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage.
H. L. MENCKENWhen somebody says it’s not about the money, it’s about the money.
More H. L. Mencken Quotes
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In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.
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A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to Heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there.
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Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
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You can’t do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.
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No one in this world, so far as I know – and I have searched the records for years, and employed agents to help me – has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people.
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The average man does not get pleasure out of an idea because he thinks it is true; he thinks it is true because he gets pleasure out of it.
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A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.
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The aim of public education is not to spread enlightenment at all; it is simply to reduce as many individuals as possible to the same safe level, to breed a standard citizenry, to put down dissent and originality.
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On one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women.
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Puritanism. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.
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It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.
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Most people want security in this world, not liberty.
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The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth.
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The common argument that crime is caused by poverty is a kind of slander on the poor.
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Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.
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Change is not progress.
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The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.
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It doesn’t take a majority to make a rebellion; it takes only a few determined leaders and a sound cause.
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The one permanent emotion of the inferior man is fear – fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexplicable. What he wants above everything else is safety.
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The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one’s time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.
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Sometimes the idiots outvote the sensible people.
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If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner.
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No professional politician is ever actually in favor of public economy. It is his implacable enemy, and he knows it. All professional politicians are dedicated wholeheartedly to waste and corruption. They are the enemies of every decent man.
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On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.
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People do not expect to find chastity in a whorehouse. Why, then, do they expect to find honesty and humanity in government, a congeries of institutions whose modus operandi consists of lying, cheating, stealing, and if need be, murdering those who resist?
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Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.
H. L. MENCKEN