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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

Frank Zappa

The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.
FRANK ZAPPA

Amount Atheist Difference Estate Religion
Sometimes you got to get sick before you can feel better.
FRANK ZAPPA

Healing Inspirational Sick
Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.
FRANK ZAPPA

Bill Bunch Date Deadline Decoration Music Production
To me absurdity is the only reality.
FRANK ZAPPA

Adsurd Reality
The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.
FRANK ZAPPA

Lady Meat Old Price
If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they’ll murder you in your sleep.
FRANK ZAPPA

Children Lame Murder Sleep
I’m not black, but there’s a whole lot of times I wish I could say I’m not white.
FRANK ZAPPA

Black White
One and one is eleven.
FRANK ZAPPA

Inspirational One Liner
My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.
FRANK ZAPPA

Advice Children Happiness Health
Why do you necessarily have to be wrong just because a few million people think you are?
FRANK ZAPPA

Inspirational People Wrong
Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.
FRANK ZAPPA

Beware Enemy Fish People
A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment.
FRANK ZAPPA

Disco Environment Philosophy Politics
The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they’re property.
FRANK ZAPPA

Kids Positive Property
So many books, so little time.
FRANK ZAPPA

Book One Liner Time
We pretend to be a free society, and we pretend to be an adult society, but if you look at the facts, our news is just as contrived, and controlled as Pravda!
FRANK ZAPPA

Adult Fact Freedom Pretend Society
The closer you are, the brighter the flames in my heart.
FRANK ZAPPA

Flame Heart Romantic

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

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Popular Authors

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