Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he’s buying.
FRAN LEBOWITZFood is an important part of a balanced diet.
More Fran Lebowitz Quotes
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Nothing succeeds like address.
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All God’s children are not beautiful. Most of God’s children are, in fact, barely presentable.
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If you’re going to America, bring your own food.
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Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs.
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Ifyou have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.
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When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the world is. Clean is not enough.
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Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
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No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.
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Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
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Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk.
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Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.
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My favorite animal is steak.
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Never relinquish clothing to a hotel valet without first specifically telling him that you want it back.
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Romantic love is mental illness. But it’s a pleasurable one. It’s a drug. It distorts reality, and that’s the point of it. It would be impossible to fall in love with someone that you really saw.
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Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat.
FRAN LEBOWITZ