Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can’t see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
ERMA BOMBECKCats invented self-esteem.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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Kids need love the most when they’re acting most unlovable.
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When you’re lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.
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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
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Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.
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Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn’t even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.
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Housework can kill you if done right.
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Every puppy should have a boy.
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Children make your life important.
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There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
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Some emotions don’t make a lot of noise. It’s hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint – like a heartbeat. And pure love – why, some days it’s so quiet, you don’t even know it’s there.
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Success is outliving your failures.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
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I remember thinking how often we look, but never see … we listen, but never hear … we exist, but never feel. We take our relationships for granted. A house is only a place. It has no life of its own. It needs human voices, activity and laughter to come alive.
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Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
ERMA BOMBECK







