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Dorothy Parker Quote - Maybe it is only I, but conditions are such these days, that if you use studiously correct grammar, people suspect you of homosexual tendencies.

Maybe it is only I, but conditions are such these days, that if you use studiously correct grammar, people suspect you of homosexual tendencies.

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Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
DOROTHY PARKER

Appearance Beautiful Greatness Healing Myself Time
And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
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Himself Run Stay
Should they whisper false of you, Never trouble to deny; Should the words they say be true, Weep and storm and say they lie.
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Deny Fake Lying Storm Trouble
A girl’s best friend is her mutter.
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Best Friendship Girl Herself
Don’t feel bad when I die; I’ve been dead for a long time.
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Bad Death Feeling Myself Time
I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
DOROTHY PARKER

End Happiness History Human Willing
Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
DOROTHY PARKER

Change Funny Life Myself Oneself Sex Story
The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk.
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Avoid Best Drink Stay Way
[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?
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Funny Hell Herself Phone
Where unwilling dies the rose; buds the new another year.
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Death Growth Rose Willing
Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
DOROTHY PARKER

Clean Dirty Hands Nature Play Target Yourself
Friends come and go but I wouldn’t have thought you’d be one of them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Friendship Myself Oneself Thinking
Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
DOROTHY PARKER

Genius Material Talent Writing
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
DOROTHY PARKER

Alcohol Quick Vice
A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.
DOROTHY PARKER

Fight Liberty Man Room Start
Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
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Death God

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