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The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.

Dorothy Parker

People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death People Young
Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.
DOROTHY PARKER

Challenge Honesty Survive Test Yourself
There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
DOROTHY PARKER

Funny Life Study Theft Yourself
Heterosexuality is not normal, it’s just common.
DOROTHY PARKER

Identity Normal Popular
Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation.
DOROTHY PARKER

Excitement Fortune Irritation
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
DOROTHY PARKER

Acceptance Leaving Myself
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
DOROTHY PARKER

Boredom Curious Deep
Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death God
And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
DOROTHY PARKER

Himself Run Stay
Money cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
DOROTHY PARKER

Diamond Health Money Myself
You do what you can, and you do it because you should. But all you can do is all you can do.
DOROTHY PARKER

Action Responsibility Yourself
Quick!! Act as if nothing has happened!
DOROTHY PARKER

Act Quick
I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.
DOROTHY PARKER

Best Books Hands Myself Run
Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.
DOROTHY PARKER

Fingers Hands Leaving Love Wisdom
Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.
DOROTHY PARKER

Age Choice Clothes Grave Life Style Time Yourself
Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat.
DOROTHY PARKER

Art Seat Writing

The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.

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The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.

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