By the time you swear you’re his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this — One of you is lying.
DOROTHY PARKERIf you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.
DOROTHY PARKER -
[On the ringing of her doorbell or telephone:] What fresh hell is this?
DOROTHY PARKER -
Don’t feel bad when I die; I’ve been dead for a long time.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
DOROTHY PARKER -
That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.
DOROTHY PARKER -
If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be at all surprised.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Now, look, baby, ‘Union’ is spelled with 5 letters. It is not a four-letter word.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I’m under the table/After four I’m under my host.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
DOROTHY PARKER -
Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
DOROTHY PARKER